for myself

i went to the C3 evening service last night. it was really cool. they changed the chairs around and Konan spoke down on the floor instead of the stage. so it was a very comfortable and close environment. there were only about thirty or forty people there and i didn't know any of them. but that was okay. Konan's sermon was ridiculously encouraging. he spoke on embracing uncertainty. his main point was that because we have certainty in Christ and the cross, we can embrace the life of uncertainty that GOD offers to us.

i left with a lot on my mind. i don't know how much that sermon really applied to my thoughts after it, but it definitely got me thinking. last night i realized that i needed to pursue Christ's love for myself. this past year i have come to love Him and need Him more than ever before. but i don't think i have ever really wanted it for myself before. in high school sometimes i just want to know Christ for the sake of being a part of Young Life (which is a hard thing for me to admit). but it's truth. and i have been realizing that if that is my only motivation, it will never be a sufficient drive to follow after Him and that i am missing out on so much. i have to realize my desperate need for the cross, remember that need every day, and make that my motivation to follow Christ.

i know that GOD has only the best for me; and i want to be disappointed with anything less than that. i am so crazy loved by Him